Since the release of Rat in the Kitchen, and more so since the tee, my family has received a number of questions. I have been asked to clear things up. This is that.
Was there a rat?
Yes.
In the kitchen?
In the pantry, technically, which has a door, which was closed, mostly. He came in through the cellar in the winter, like everyone does. He was small, grey, and had excellent taste: he only ever touched the pecorino.
During service?
Never. We have standards, and so, it turned out, did he. He kept restaurant hours. Closed in the afternoon, busy after eleven.
Why is there a song about it?
Because I was fifteen and it was the most exciting thing that had happened in Sirolo since the speakers blew at the festa. Because my father chased him with a ladle and lost, twice. Because it has a very good bassline, and once a thing has a very good bassline it is out of my hands.
Why is there a t-shirt about it?
Because you asked. It is the tee that gets the most comments, by a distance. People stop you in the supermarket. You have been warned.
Where is the rat now?
We do not discuss it. My mother says he "moved to Numana". I choose to believe her. He got a song and a shirt, which, as I have said elsewhere, is more than most of my exes.
The rest of the kitchen is in the Cucina Dorèlli era: Carbonara, Tiramisu, Forno e Cuore, Barolo. No further rats are planned. No further rats were planned last time either.